“A Wife of noble character, who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.”
As we pull into the drive on Friday night, we notice that our neighbor is at it again! She is a single mom of three girls. She works full time and spends her expendable hours at ball diamonds following her athletic girls. But Friday evening, she was using her precious time at home to tackle her overgrown lawn. Every few feet, the mower would choke out and die. She would roll her eyes, sigh in exasperation and start it all over again. My husband, who has been in conflict about this since we moved in, says, ” I would be happy to help her but I don’t know how to approach her. She’s wearing the look.” “The Look?” “Yes, She’s strong like you and she wears a look that says, “I’ve got it all under control.” Ah. “The Look”. I know it all to well.
Unfortunately, I haven’t done a great job in cluing my husband into what “The Look” really means. “The Look”, otherwise known as our Game Face. You know, the one we wear when our list of things to do is longer than the hours we have available in our day. The one that means we’re stressed to the max and ready to break, but will not show it. No ma’am. The look that sends our husband scrambling to the nearest easy chair he can find. He knows that when “The Look” comes out, there is no way in heck he is going to win. No matter how hard he tries. Ladies, what a tragedy.
When I think about my game face, I realize there is no one I can blame but myself. My need to appear in control takes over and I allow my pride into the driver seat. I, under no circumstances, can ask for help. Nor can I accept it when it is offered. It would appear that I am weak and unable to manage all of my responsibilities. It would appear that I am some how lazy. Possibly that I don’t manage my time well. Or I’m spoiled, because heaven forbid my man would willingly do something as trivial as our laundry. It means that I am falling short of the high standards that are expected of my. But my question is, Who? Who places these standards on me to look, act and behave in this manner of insanity? The answer is simple. Its me.
Mother’s Day weekend is approaching. The Day in which Mom’s are celebrated for their Superhero abilities. Or is that really it? This week, when I am tempted to put on my game face, I am going to make a conscious effort to instead ask for help. Or, I am going to pleasantly accept it when it is offered. And, when the project is completed, I am going to say “Thank you!”, even when it may or may not be completed up to my normally high standards. This Mom is tired of trying to keep up the Game Face. As Flylady says, “Housework, done imperfectly, still blesses your family.”
“If I was your mom, I could understand the conversation you are both trying to have with me right now. But I’m not, so you will have to speak one at a time!” David Landrus